Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Seriously?

Well, I saw a doctor today. Not my normal doctor, because he is away, but the guy that is supposed to take care of my while my doctor is gone. My appointment was not exactly encouraging. I mean, I was not expecting him to send me to the hospital to deliver my baby or anything, but what he did say was that the baby's head is nowhere near "engaged". No kidding? Well, I guess that explains my incessant urge to throw up. The baby is riding around in my rib cage instead of my pelvis. This did not come as any shock to me, but then he said that my doctor would be back on time to deliver the baby. I asked when he would be back and he said next week. So. I am already a day overdue and you are telling me I'll easily go another week??? I asked him if it was really that uncommon when it is not a first baby for the baby to not move down until the mom is in labour. He said that no, it is not uncommon. Then he told me to book in with my doctor in a week. Great. Thanks. I almost cried. My babies are always due around Mike's holidays and they never come at the beginning. They always come at the end. This one will not be at the end, or I'd be a month and a half overdue, but we are still missing out on half of Mike's holidays. I'm feeling really sick to my stomach today too, as of about 5 a.m., and I was hoping that was a sign of something, or would even trigger labour, but of course, no. I know, I know. I'm only one day overdue. "That's not bad." Not so. Every day overdue is indeed "that bad". This is something that you don't learn until you have been pregnant and overdue. I used to think three or four days overdue was not that bad either. But when you can't do anything and you feel sick and you are forced to just sit or lay and think about the fact that you are not in labour, feeling exceedingly disappointed every morning when you don't wake up in terrible pain, every day is an exercise in torture.

I think I'll go lay in my bed and cry. I have no patience to be around my boys right now anyway. My baby is having a good time in there, I guess. Either that or he/she is afraid to come out because I am too stressed out or something. I don't know. I'm just worn out. And irritated. I could do a huge venting session in here, but I don't dare. I think I really better go lay down for a while. Sounds like we're having some company in a little while, so it would be good if I had some rest first, lest I be too grouchy.

Speaking of grouchy, Jamie is having a tantrum directed at me right now for no reason. Seriously, for no reason. I think it's funny. I'm off to my room for some alone time. Maybe one day I'll have something new and fresh to write in here. Or maybe I'll be pregnant forever. Hard to say at this point.

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