Monday, August 31, 2009

This is insane!

Today started at 5:30 a.m. I fed Micah, who actually had not eaten since midnight, so that was pretty good. However, he could not get back to sleep because he has phlegm in his throat that he can neither swallow nor cough up. I got him settled by 6:30 a.m., but not before Cody was awake. By 7:30 a.m., Jamie was BACK in bed, because he was so grouchy. He was only up for about ten minutes. I was not looking forward to the rest of the day. I fed Micah again at 7:30 a.m. and when I was done with him, I discovered that he had peed through his diaper, his clothes and his blankets, and my shirt was also soaked. Wonderful. My day was already swirling towards disaster.

Before lunch, the boys were pretty good. Not awesome, but decent.

Oh sick! Jamie is crying now. It is 2:19 p.m. That means he probably pooped and is now in pain from a diaper rash that he got a couple of days ago after a poop went undiscovered in his diaper for several hours. Oh boy. He sounds really miserable. Guess I'll have to continue this after I deal with him.

Oh boy. This just keeps getting worse and worse. Before lunch, I was feeding Micah in the living room and I heard the answering machine go. I don't mean that the phone rang. It did not. Jamie was standing in his high chair pressing buttons on the answering machine. He then recorded a message which was quite lengthy and consisted of Cody asking repeatedly, "Can I have a message?" and me shouting, "Jamie, get down off your high chair! Jamie, get away from the answering machine! Cody, get in here!" Well, you get the drift. I have yet to discover whether he recorded it as a message or whether it is our new greeting. It is a fairly accurate picture of what goes on around here.

After that, I fed them lunch. Cheez Whiz sandwiches. (Gross.) I was in the living room again when I heard Cody announce, "Mom, we're putting Cheez Whiz in our hair!" Oh boy.

A while later, Jamie was in bed and I was just getting Cody out the door to play outside for a while when he announced that he needed to poop. Okay. I was feeding Micah again, so I could not participate in this blessed event. I told him to go ahead and do it himself. He did. He then shouted out his traditional sing-song, "Mo-om, I want-cha!" I shouted back that I was busy with Micah and would not be able to come and wipe him. He protested and said he'd wait for me. I informed him that it would be a while and told him to do it himself. Then, right after Micah finished eating, I heard a blast from him. Uh-oh. Okay, I decided I would burp him and hold him until he was finished what he started. I burped him. I then decided to let him finish his business laying on the floor on a blanket while I ran to help Cody, who was still in the bathroom. I called out to Cody that I was coming and I put Micah down on his blanket. I then heard a flush. Okay, I guess he decided to do it on his own after all. When I arrived, he was still sitting on the toilet and said he wanted help. I looked at the toilet paper roll. It was substantially skinnier than when I had seen it last, about half an hour before. Oh dear. The toilet was pretty full of toilet paper. I took a chance and tried flushing anyway. It did not take. By some small mercy, the toilet did not overflow. Our old one would have.

So, I got Cody cleaned up and ran back for Micah, who was wailing by now. I carried him to the change table in his room and put him down on his back. Great Jehoshaphat! The front of his adorable overalls were soaked in poop. I looked down at my own shirt, that I had been holding him against. It was spared! Unfortunately, he was wearing a "onesie" underneath it that goes on over the head. Incidentally, it was the first time that one was ever worn. I guess he christened it quite thoroughly. I had to pull it down his body instead of dragging it over his head. So, I got him cleaned up, which was quite a task. I then put him down on his blanket on the floor again so that I could clean up his clothes. I considered using my diaper sprayer, but then I was reminded of the plugged toilet. Did I mention that I am no good with a plunger? This is going to be a job for Super Dad. Won't he be excited to get home?!

As I scrubbed poop off the clothes, Micah screamed in the background while Cody asked over and over again for fridge water. I finally came and physically removed him from the house. I told him that if he came in again he would not get his water, but if he waited outside I would bring it to him as soon as I could. Phew. That took care of one of them.

Once the clothes were scrubbed and hung in the bathroom, I came out and got water for Cody. I then came in to deal with Micah, who was still hysterical. I held him to calm him down and Cody immediately was on the scene again. It is impossible to get a moment's peace around here. I finally got Cody out the door and started this blog post and then I heard Jamie start to cry. Suspecting yet another poop situation, I put Micah down. I wondered how I would deal with Jamie's poop with a clogged toilet. When I got in his room, he was thrashing around in his crib, snarking at me and whining and crying. I tried giving him water. He got mad. I asked him what was wrong. He got mad. I tried to pick him up. More anger. I was starting to worry. He had to be sick, to be acting like that. I went and got some Tylenol. He got mad. He refused to take any. His diaper was also not an issue. I started to leave. He got mad. I offered the medicine again. He got mad. I gave up. He cried some more. Wow. In the background, I heard Micah start bawling again.

Jamie went back to sleep. Cody just got back in the house. Lately he does not like being outside alone. He just went to Micah's room to play with GeoTrax. I can live with that! Micah is in my arms, and I am finding this typing to be quite painful on my wrists. I am very stressed about my homework, which I feel utterly incapable of doing in the midst of all this chaos. Even still, I do not have great confidence in my ability to do it all this evening either. One way or another, I will be interrupted because I will have to feed Micah. Those interruptions are long. I desperately want to take a break from my course, but I am afraid to let myself because if I can't handle it now, how will it be any better a few weeks or even months from now?? It will not be. I might try putting this baby down somewhere so I can at least attempt more work on my assignment. Who ever said that being a stay at home mom was an easy job? certainly not me, that's for sure. I can't even finish a single task without a million interruptions. I have not finished loading the dishwasher yet, and I was working on it this morning. I would love to fold my clean laundry, but have not had the opportunity yet. Phew.

Anyway, I am really getting sore here. I better sign off. Maybe I can do a bit of homework. A nap would be fantastic too, but I don't dare.

3:57 p.m. Just a little update for you here. Cody just broke his glasses in half. Yep. In half. Now he has two monocles. He is now telling me, "I need to see!" Great. A fitting end to the day. Except it is not the end. We still have another three to four hours before the older two boys are in bed for the night, and even then it is not over because there is still Micah. Our days are never over.

1 comment:

lululu said...

i thought my experience was insane enough!
but no, it's totally nothing. yours was really something!