Thursday, January 28, 2010

About to blow up.

Mere words cannot describe the kind of day I'm having, nor the one I had yesterday. So much for breakthroughs. So much for positive times with Cody. I am supposed to be going on a date tonight. I don't want to go. Actually, I would like to go away for the whole weekend with just Micah. It isn't that I want to get away from Mike, it's just that if he comes too we have to bring the kids and I desperately need to get away from them. I feel like an utter failure as a mother. I have been the worst kind of example for my kids. I have to wonder what Micah thinks of all the yelling. It probably scares him. Maybe a whole week off would be good. Maybe two. I don't know. All I know is the Supernanny must have left something out of her show, because what I'm doing is not working. Nothing is working. I am at my wits' end, and feeling like a total loser. Sorry for the negative rant. I am just trying to get this out so I don't blow up. I better go. Somehow I still have to cook supper before Mike brings his co-worker home to babysit. I didn't know it was happening tonight until last night, so I have been in a panic all day trying to get everything cleaned and ready. I called Mike a while ago to cancel, but he didn't answer. I better try again. I'm off.

1 comment:

Jo said...

So was there a date or not? I think you need a break, change of scenery and some loving and such too! It's not easy and it's nice to be able to shut off some of the Mommy mode!