Sunday, August 12, 2012

Recovering

Lauren is now twelve days old. I feel like time is flying already. It feels like only a few days ago that she was born, likely because our hospital stay was extended longer than usual. I'm happy to report that Lauren is doing very well, eating, sleeping, gaining weight...and yesterday for the first time since arriving home she pooped. Haha. We were getting quite concerned, as it had been eight days, but it seems she is on track now.

I am slowly getting better too. No more fevers, and my antibiotics are now done. I am still very tired, which is normal too for this stage, but I am maybe a touch weaker than I would be if not for the low hemoglobin. Our nights are not too horrible. She usually only wakes up twice to eat, and as long as she settles easily afterwards, we do all right. Last night was not a good one. Lauren was good, but Micah was in our room literally five times, complaining of nightmares and then simply not being able to sleep after that. I think he is feeling really insecure right now. He has not stopped whining all morning so far today. I am feeling sorry for him and wondering if he needs a really good cuddle.

As for me, I could use a good outing. We did go to the library yesterday, for the first time in three years. That's right, the last time I had a membership there was right before and right after Micah was born. Shortly after that I stopped going because it was too hard to chase Jamie (19 months old then) and carry a baby around too. Going to the library is an exercise in containment. I would not go without another adult, unless somehow I went completely alone. Now that I have four kids, going anywhere completely alone is bound to be a rare occurrence at best. So we all went together. Mike started with the boys in the kids' book section, and I was there too. Then I snuck off to find books for myself. This is a very small town library, so it should not be overwhelming, but for me it is. The adult fiction books are all lumped into one section. There is no dividing it into categories like suspense, drama...etc. So if you don't know what authors you like, it's pretty overwhelming to just start scanning the many shelves at random. I did manage to snatch four books up before Lauren had a diaper issue and Mike had to take her out to the van, where we left her diaper bag, to change her. At that time, I was back on containment duty.

And so ended our trip to the library. I figured four books was still something of a victory for me, and they should certainly occupy me for a little while. I should have gone to the library when I was still pregnant, but no matter. I have some reading material now, and a brand new membership that should be good for a year. The boys were thrilled to get some books to read too, so all in all the trip was well worth it.

But I'd like to go somewhere else. I'd like to go to a lake somewhere. Somewhere beautiful and quiet, that smells fresh like pine trees and clean air. What I wouldn't give to breathe the air at the top of the mountain again like last summer. That was the best air ever. But a serene, secluded lake would be so nice right now too. I miss Lake of the Woods. I have not been there in seven years. That is just too long. When all our kids are older, even just a little older, we will do trips like we did last summer, on a regular basis. I look forward to that. For now, I will have to try to at least exit the house a few times a week. Hopefully that will be enough to keep me sane and ward off depression.

I'll end with a few more pictures of Lauren. In the first one, Cody is holding her. This is a frequent occurrence these days. He always wants to hold her, whether she is happy or wailing. It's very sweet.

These next three were taken last night, at 11 days old. She is wearing a sleeper that two of her brothers wore. It is very cozy and sweet, one of my favourites. Cody never wore it as we got it when Jamie was a baby. She is too big for newborn size, because she is so long! But 0-3 months is working, so she at least has a little bit of a wardrobe to work with.




On that note, I'm signing off for now.



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