Monday, April 22, 2013

Dear Adventures, I'd rather be bored.

Life is an adventure. That's what "they" say, and it certainly sounds appealing. When I think of adventures, I picture grand landscapes with cascading waterfalls, rocky cliffs, and other beautiful scenes with striking natural wonders. In reality, I would never be caught climbing a mountain, or anything remotely close to it, so I'm not sure why adventure conjures up these types of images in my mind. Perhaps it is because something really stirs my soul when I see the mountains towering high above me, or when I hear the thundering of a massive waterfall and feel the cool spray on my face. It reminds me of how small we are compared to this vast Earth. It puts things in perspective. Or, maybe it's just because I never go anywhere, so my definition of adventure is simply seeing something out of the ordinary.

Raising children is out of the ordinary. Don't ever let anyone tell you that being a stay-at-home-mom is boring. Sure, it has its moments. When you only have one child and that child is still a baby or a toddler that is not talking yet, and meaningful conversation has taken a leave of absence from your life. Meaningful adult conversation, that is. Sometimes it feels like the brain is not challenged enough. The alternative is having kids that are crazy and keep you constantly wracking your brain for solutions to their actions.

Let me give you an example. On Saturday evening we put the kids to bed like usual. When we were tucking them in, I caught Jamie with a marble in his mouth. It's from the game Hungry, Hungry, Hippos. Jamie is my five-year-old, by the way, so you'd think he'd have more sense than that. I got after him and told him in no uncertain terms that he was never, ever to put toys in his mouth. So we settled them in bed and I left, taking the offending marble with me. Soon after, Micah emerged from the room crying. He told us that a marble went down his hole. With a bit of work, we were able to confirm that he meant he swallowed it. First reaction? Honestly, there was a little bit of laughter, albeit the nervous kind, and a little bit of panic too. What does one do when one's child swallows a foreign object? Do I call Health Links? (That's a phone service where you can talk to a registered nurse and get a little advice on medical issues. In my experience, they usually tell you to call an ambulance.) Micah's throat was somewhat sore from swallowing something so hard and unforgiving, but apparently the marble made it down without incident.

I called the hospital and found out our best course of action was to wait and watch. Okay. If you have a two-year-old, it's easy enough to monitor diapers for passing foreign objects. A potty-trained child is another matter. I'm not going to get into the details, but the last 36 hours have entailed waiting for poops and then a process involving the toilet and a spatula. Today, thankfully, Micah pooped the marble out safe and sound. He was quite proud of it, and the marble was easily visible. I don't think I should share the rest. I just don't. Suffice it to say, it was gross, and I am still rather disturbed by the whole incident, though admittedly a little amused too. I hope it never happens again. Adventure number one. Or maybe that one was adventure number two. Certainly more applicable.

Our other adventure involves Bandit, whom I mentioned in my last post. Bandit ran away last night and we have not seen him since. Twice, I have driven around, blowing a whistle and scanning the countryside. I have seen no sign of him. This is extremely distressing to me. Bandit is my sister's dog. He does not know this area. I have no idea where he went. I spent my day calling vet clinics, animal rescues and animal control personnel, and sending his picture out to local people and businesses. Now, I am praying he will return safely to us. Each hour that passes, I feel less and less hope that we are going to see him again, and I feel terrible. I imagine what may have happened to him, or where he might end up. Is he alive? Is he hurt? Did somebody take him? Will somebody spot him and call me? I can only hope and pray we will find him soon. He is bound to be hungry, though I wouldn't put it past him to hunt a rabbit to hold him over.

Having said all that, my day has been very exciting, but I would trade this kind of excitement for a dose of good old-fashioned boredom. I hope to have a positive conclusion to this particular adventure very soon. In the meantime, if you are willing, please say a prayer that Bandit will return safely to us as soon as possible.

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